


The weirdest porn you will ever read

by destiencestiel (knottedprince)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alien Castiel, Deansturbation, Masturbation, Other, Oviposition, Trans Dean, casturbation, disgust, no actual contact between the two of them, terrible characterisation, weird alien sex parts, weird eggs spewing out of an unexplained giant phallus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-01
Updated: 2016-11-01
Packaged: 2018-08-28 10:51:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8443057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knottedprince/pseuds/destiencestiel
Summary: Dean thinks he's got some privacy on the ship of the aliens who abducted him. An alien named Castiel sees him masturbating and offers to show him how aliens masturbate. Dean almost throws up when Cas comes





	

Dean was sexually frustrated. And who could blame him? There was no way of measuring time in outer space but he was pretty damn sure it had been a year or more since he had last gotten laid, hell it had probably been longer. And hell knows there's no privacy to take matters into his own hands on some weird-ass alien spaceship where he's being held as some sort of specimen.

So who can blame him, really, for wanting to release a little tension. And who can blame him for thinking he had privacy when they transfered him to a room with solid, opaque walls.

He sucked on his middle and ring finger for a few seconds before slipping his hand down the front of his pants, letting out a soft sigh when he slid his fingers down towards his entrance. He was already wet, and he slid his fingers inside himself before rolling onto his stomach, grinding down against his hand. His fingers were just brushing against his most sensitive spot, and he arched his back, pressing his clit against the heel of his hand while he wiggled the tips of his fingers inside himself.

He unintentionally let out a soft moan, wishing his fingers could go deeper as he fucked himself onto them. It didn't take long before he was coming, clenching his teeth and clasping at the bed with his free hand, riding out the waves of pleasure. When his orgasm was over, he awkwardly but efficiently wiped his fingers off on the inside of his pants, rolling onto his back and lying there with his eyes closed for a few seconds as he gasped for breath. Damn, he had needed that.

He rolled his head to the side and opened his eyes to check if the door was still closed, only to find it open. In the doorway stood one of the aliens, sporting a shocked expression and holding a clipboard.  
"How much of that did you see?" asked Dean, hoping the alien wouldn't have some creepy or perverted reaction. The alien dropped his gaze, then looked to the side and back to Dean.  
"most of it" came the reply. Dean sighed, covering his face with his (clean) hand.

  
"Do you know what I was doing?" he asked, half hoping the creature was agametic and had no clue.  
"if it was what it was thought to be" he stated tonelessly, not quite forming the sentence properly but sort of getting the message across. Dean shook his head. The alien closed the door behind himself, placing his clipboard on the shelf near the door and approaching Dean.  
"you simulated reproductive sensations to release accumulated sexual urges"

Dean looked at him with a frown. "Don't talk about jerking off like that, you'll put me off for life," he accused, regarding the creatures vocabulary. The creature tilted his head, not understanding Dean but deciding comprehension was unneccesary. He then sat on a seat near Dean's bed, and turned to face him.

"would you be interested in seeing how mine work" he asked casually, breaking his usual speech pattern of only using statements. Dean didn't know what to say. On the one hand, he was curious. On the other hand, it was kinda creepy. Despite himself, he realised he was nodding. The alien nodded back at him and stood up. "my name is castiel" he stated matter-of-factly while pulling down his pants, revealing... nothing. Dean did a double take, looking at the point in between the aliens legs where there was nothing but a smooth expanse of skin.

Castiel reached behind himself, untying his shirt and unwrapping his torso, which was also similar to that of a human despite the lack of nipples and a navel. From where a navel should have been, running down for about two inches was a strange texture to the skin, a sort of pinkish shininess, and Castiel pressed his hands around this area, drawing in a sharp hiss of breath through his teeth.

Visible shudders ran through his body as he kneaded the flesh, and after a few moments Dean was shocked to see that a small pink bump was poking out of the skin. Castiel brought his hand up to his mouth and spat onto his fingers, and then moved the spit along the pink skin. A sound akin to a moan came from his chest as he pressed against the skin surrounding the bump, and when Dean looked at his face he was flushed and biting his lip. Castiel then took a finger and pressed it just above the bump, and Dean was surprised when the finger slipped into the flesh there. Castiel let out a moan, pressing his finger deeper, and pulling it out again.

Castiel then wrapped his fingers around the pink nub, squeezing it lightly before tugging on it. Dean felt a pang of nausea and some unexpected arousal when a pink mass of flesh roughly the same size and shape as a beer bottle slid out of the skin with a soft slipping noise. Castiel made a double fist around the thick base of it, clasping his fingers around the thing and sliding his hands upwards toward the narrow tip. Castiel's eyes rolled back slightly and he took a step backwards, falling heavily into a slouching position on the seat, sliding his hands back down and pressing them against the base. He didn't move for a few moments, holding his hands firmly against the skin surrounding the member, and then he started massaging the base.

Dean was perplexed and fascinated and disgusted and aroused at the same time, and these feelings only amplified when Castiel groaned and squeezed the base tight, resulting in the bulge moving slightly upward. Castiel moaned outright, suddenly sitting up straight and gripping himself flush against his skin where the fat base had grown thinner, pressing his fist slowly upwards and moving the bulge toward the tip.

His moaning increased, and suddenly Dean saw something that he absolutely did not want to see. He almost gagged when he saw the first few tiny egg-like spheres burst out of Castiel and roll down onto the floor. Dean actually made a gagging sound and had to look away when he realised that more were coming, that the bulge consisted of those... eggs.

Castiel made whimpering, cooing noises as the tip opened suddenly, releasing hundreds of eggs at once. He used both of his hands to create a constant upwards moving pressure, squeezing the last few eggs out, and his phallus began slowly retreating. He then turned to Dean, not expecting to see Dean's disgusted expression. "Were... were those eggs?" Dean asked, staring incredulously at the small heap of semi-translucent whiteish bubbles on the floor. God, they looked like squeegees. Castiel looked down at them too. Clearly, the human had not appreciated the display. He nodded silently and reached for his shirt, using it to collect as many of the eggs as possible in the fabric, then silently left, taking his clipboard and pants with him on the way out, leaving Dean staring at the closed door in disbelief.

**Author's Note:**

> im so sorry for this shitty piece of writing. Creds to wrenseroticlibrary and their weird mermaid porn that inspired me to write more weird non-human sex bits. This work has not been proofread nor beta'd


End file.
